Not newly awoken, not roused in the middle of the night by a dream.
Still awake.
What does that make me?
What have I become?
Nothing has changed, yet everything is different.
I have embraced the things I used to hide from,
used to cower from,
block out of my head.
The thoughts, the very notions.
Trying to pluck out guitar lines of songs we haven't the faintest idea how to play.
At 3 in the morning.
Seems like a pointless, boring activity..
but something about it simply makes it fun.
Amazing, even.
Taking what we have in stride, and running with it,
not thinking of where it takes us.
Because it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter that the day doesn't end until 4 in the morning.
We enjoy it.
I enjoy it.
When tomorrow is so uncertain, today is all I have.
And today
I am happy.
Dozing on shoulders while testing our vocabulary skills for Africa
until 2.30 in the morning.
Because we don't want it to end.
I don't want it to end.
Not necessarily the guitar playing, nor the quizzes.
But the idea. The concept.
I don't want it to end.
I don't want today to end.
(footnote: it's 5.30 a.m., I still have One Last Breath by Creed stuck in my head, and I didn't have to edit this post for mistakes.)
2 comments:
I'm going to have to put a curfew on you and you NEED to go out and get a job!!
BUT, the writing is very good and I know that there have many times in the past that I too have not wanted the day to end and stayed awake until the wee hours of the morning. Mostly because my mind just doesn't want to shut down.
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